When you think about people, do you tend to think about what you love about them or what irritates you?
If you said yes to the latter, you’re not alone. Our brains have a “negativity bias” that pushes us to see the negative in people and situations, so that we can stay cautious and keep ourselves protected. By seeing the negative in others, our brain puts its guard up, so that we can stay safe from people who might hurt us.
However, if we constantly focus on the negative qualities in others, we attract an endless stream of negativity into our lives. Instead, simply changing our focus to seeing the good in others is an incredibly powerful way to feel happier, be more positive, and feel amazing.
How Does Looking for the Good in Others Help Us Feel Better?
You Grow Yourself
If you focus on people’s negative traits, there is absolutely no benefit for you. You will compare your qualities to theirs and feel superior to them, rather than focusing on your faults and working to improve them.
However, when you look at the good in others, you have a positive example to aspire to. Whether it is positive personality traits or particular abilities, by observing how good others are, you will feel inspired to improve yourself too.
You Feel Happier
Whatever you focus on grows. When you start looking for the good in others, you will just see more of the good. Qualities you did not notice earlier in people will begin to pop up unexpectedly. Your interactions will be more positive, and you will begin to feel good energy surrounding everyone. When you feel like everyone around you is amazing, there is no way you won’t feel tremendously happier and more positive.
On the other hand, if we focus on the bad qualities of everyone around us, we dig a ditch or ourselves. We will end up feeling frustrated with people’s lack of ability, get annoyed by their negative traits, or even feel afraid and unsafe. When you focus on the negative, you will end up feeling more negative too. As they say, misery loves company.
You Make People Feel Good
Is there any negative outcome of making people around you feel good? Of course not! When you look for the good in others, you make everyone you interact with feel special and worthy. Not only will they like YOU more, and maybe even be kinder to you and be more helpful, but you may even help them in ways you can’t imagine. One in four people suffer from mental health issues, many of which stem from feelings of low self-worth. By choosing to find the good in someone, you may never know the lasting impact you may have on someone’s self-esteem and self-worth.
You See the Good in You
When we judge others, we are often judging an aspect of ourselves. For example, if you don’t like how loud someone is, it’s quite possible that you don’t give yourself the permission to be loud. At some point, you decided “loud is bad”.
When you learn to look at the good in others, you can accept the parts of yourself that you have previously rejected.
Life is Too Short
Your energy, thoughts, and time are precious. Why waste it on finding faults in others? If you truly don’t get along with someone, move on! Don’t get hung up on their negative qualities.
Looking for the good in others is always a win-win situation. Try practicing it today; in each interaction you have, try to think of one good thing about the other person. At the end of the day, notice how good you feel!
