Have you ever felt broken and defeated, like you have lost everything? Maybe you have gone through an intense breakup, or you lost your job. Maybe you even lost your savings in a bad deal. Or perhaps you lost a loved one.
Whatever you have lost, literally or figuratively, know that there is light at the end of the tunnel. As cliche as that sound, know that while it feels bad right now, this is only one chapter of your life – not your whole story. Often times, these devastating chapters we live through propels us to the next chapters of our life that are extraordinary. Sometimes by losing everything, we also gain freedom.
Losing Everything Gives You Freedom from Your Fear and Limitations
When you have lost everything that is dear to you, you are free from your fear. Now that you have lived through your worst-case scenario, what is stopping you? What could be worse than losing everything? With this knowledge, comes immense power and strength. There is nothing left stopping you anymore. So, what is your move? What is the crazy thing you always wanted to do but you never did?
You have nothing to lose, so why not see what happens?
Freedom From Your “Fake” Self
When you lose everything externally, whether that is money, relationships, physical traits, or anything else that you previously identified with, you find the true version of yourself without anything else. For example, let’s say you were in a relationship and lost your identity while in it. Your life had become transformed to revolve boyfriend and you’ve always associated yourself as X’s girlfriend. You matched his schedule, spent time doing things he enjoys, and watched movies he likes. When you lose this relationship, not only will you find tremendous freedom in how you spend time, but you also get to rediscover yourself, without this relationship. What do you enjoy doing? Who are you as a person?
The same thing goes with looks, money, or a career. At the end of the day, those things are just how society sees us. But what defines you is much more; it’s your thoughts, your attitude, and your decisions. Often, we only come to meet our true selves when everything else is stripped away.
Freedom From What Doesn’t Work
If your loss comes from a failure, then you, my friend, have just gained some invaluable experience. You’ve now been given a clear indication of what doesn’t work. The more you ‘fail’, the closer you get to finding the solution. So, use this situation as a source of learning. See what didn’t work and try again.
Freedom From Expectation
When you have failed and lost everything, no one can expect much from you, right? Free from these expectations, you can choose to spend your time and energy on what truly matters to you. For example, perhaps your parents always expected you to go to a good college, get a degree, and get a good job. If you manage to lose that, they probably won’t have many expectations anymore. They’ll just want you to get back on your two feet, in any way possible. While this may sound pessimistic, it can actually be a good thing and offer a lot of freedom! Without their expectations, you can now choose to follow your own path. Perhaps you wanted to travel the world and create documentaries. With no expectations, you are free to follow your heart. And who knows, maybe that’s what leads you to your inevitable success!
Freedom from Attachment
When you lose everything, suddenly whatever you do have is a bonus. Everything, whether tangible or not, is a gift. When you begin living like this, you truly experience peace and freedom. Appreciate everything you have, whether it is your relationships, your health, your fitness, your capacity to think, or the beautiful sunset you can see.
It’s all a gift. When you lose everything, you often find true freedom from the shackles of expectation, external identities, attachment, and fear. So, if you find yourself in a similar situation, don’t lose heart. It might just be a blessing in disguise.
