I feel like as a society, we feel the need to comment on everything. Social media amplifies those feelings by having a built-in audience who is ready to engage with us 24/7. When we feel wronged, we tend to look for validation that we were indeed wronged in some way.
While this can feel satisfying at times, sometimes the best response is no response.
Staying Silent
If you are in the middle of an argument, sometimes it can be good to sit back and let the other person vent. This gives the other person permission to let their emotions out. Once the emotional level has balanced again, you can start engaging in the conversation.
If someone is truly venting, avoid interrupting them. Often, we feel like we have given the other person enough time and space to vent, and then we begin cutting them off. We might say “okay, calm down,” or “enough”. If they haven’t been able to release their emotions fully, the situation will most likely continue to escalate.
In this situation, maturity is holding onto your emotions, but staying quiet, even when you don’t agree. Soon enough, when they have let out enough emotion, you will be able to have a productive conversation.
When You Shouldn’t Respond
Sometimes someone says something hurtful because they want attention. You see this a lot on social media, and I have seen it on our YouTube channel. We’ve all seen those trolls or haters who love dropping negative comments across the anonymous space of the internet. Coming across a negative comment directed towards you can rile you up. But it’s important to remember that by responding, you are often giving the person exactly what they want. By engaging with them, you might lose credibility and get stuck in a position where you have to defend yourself.
In this case, no response is often the most powerful response.
Take 5 Minutes
If someone makes a comment or says something that really pushes your buttons, try taking a pause before responding. Avoid immediately responding when you are feeling emotionally triggered. Take a few deep breaths, go for a run, release some steam, and then return to the situation.
The key to navigating difficult or hurtful situations is to understand that not everything requires your comment. You can’t control what others do or say, but you can control how you respond.
Remember, when you respond to someone who is trying to insult you, you give them power. Rather than reacting, know your self-worth. This might mean staying calm and ignoring insults or passive-aggressive behavior, because you know that other people’s words or comments do not determine who you are.
