As we all know, not everything in life goes how we want it to go. We all experience suffering, some more than others. But we also all know that suffering can be overcome, and if we hang on to this important piece of the puzzle, we can prevent ourselves from wallowing in self-pity and handle our suffering in a more productive way. Remember, even when it doesn’t feel like it, nothing is so bad that it cannot be overcome.
Negatives Of Wallowing in Self-Pity
Feeling sad sometimes is healthy and normal, but self-pity is a little different than just being sad. Self-pity is when we unnecessarily exaggerate our suffering and make it seem like we have no chance of overcoming it. Let’s take a look at some of the consequences of self-pity:
Self-Pity Keeps Us in a Cycle of Negative Thoughts
The first consequence of self-pity is that it keeps us in a recurring cycle of negative thoughts that are not conducive to improving our situation. Thinking negatively all of the time is bad for your mental health and can cause additional problems in your life including relationship problems and issues with productivity.
Self-Pity Prevents Us from Taking Action
Self-pity also prevents us from taking action to improve our situation. Rather than taking ownership of our lives, we blame our suffering on outside forces; this only prevents us from being able to see what we can do to end our suffering.
Self-Pity Makes Us Suffer Longer
Going off the last point, self-pity tends to make us suffer longer than we would otherwise. Wallowing only makes us waste time that we could be using to solve our problems.
Why Should You Try to Overcome Suffering?
How to Overcome Self-Pity and Suffering
Self-pity is not doing us any favors. If you have found yourself in the cycle of self-pity and need to find a way out, here are four tips for beginning to overcome self-pity and overcome your suffering.
Change Your Mindset
The first step to overcoming self-pity is to change your mindset regarding your suffering. Remind yourself that you have power over what happens in your life and this pain won’t last forever. Start viewing your life as something that you are actively participating in rather than something that is happening to you.
Once you have changed your mindset, practice gratitude to remind yourself of everything you have to be thankful for in your life. Think of the things that are going well in your life, the people who are always there for you, and the successes you’ve had no matter how small. Try writing down three to five things you are grateful for every day, especially when you feel self-pity coming on.
Identify Changes You Can Make
The next step is to identify changes you can make in your life to eliminate or lessen your suffering. Believe it or not, you have the power to improve your life; you just need to be willing to put in the effort to make it better.
Allow Yourself to Feel It, Then Let it Go
Finally, when you begin to feel sad about your circumstances in life, remember this advice: allow yourself to feel it, then let it go. Feeling sad is normal, but you shouldn’t carry that emotion for too long. So let it out, but don’t forget to move on afterward.