Whenever I hear this quote I think of Westworld. But it has much older origins. In Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet, Friar Lawrence warns Romeo that these violent delights will have violent ends when he secretly marries Juliet.
Romeo and Juliet met at a party Juliet’s father has thrown to celebrate finding Juliet a young husband from the aristocracy. He has planned for them to marry. But Romeo crashes the party and as soon as he and Juliet see each other, they fall in love.
In this world, the pair even speaking to each other would be dangerous because they their families are in opposition in an ancient Veronian feud. Even just to be found talking to each other would be dangerous. Romeo and Juliet end up talking, falling in love and agree to get married in secret the next day, by the local clergyman, Friar Lawrence.
While Romeo and Friar Lawrence are waiting for Juliet to arrive for the ceremony, he tells Romeo that he hopes that he and Juliet don’t regret going through with this. Romeo declares that it doesn’t matter because anything bad that can happen will not cancel the joy of being with Juliet.
Friar Lawrence shakes his head and tells Romeo, “these violent delights have violent ends” – meaning that such extreme, intense emotions of that kind of pleasure often ends in disaster. And like a true Shakespeare tragedy, it does.
It’s easy to get wrapped up in love and the newness of a relationship. I think back to some really bad decisions I made when I was younger. These decisions were often fueled by being in love and pure emotion. Often times, the end result of these decisions were not optimal for me at all.
When you feel drawn to something with such intensity, try to take a step back and slow things down. There is a huge difference between intensity and intimacy.
