Often times we get lost in our own lives – whether it’s our own struggles, dramas or even happiness. We forget that we here as part of something much bigger. I believe we are all here for a reason, for a purpose. When you think about it, every encounter we have with others, has the potential to change their life…You see, we are all connected. And I know this sounds dramatic, but let me tell you a story…
In the summer of 2016, my husband and I were on a huge road trip that spanned nearly two months. We were in one of my favorite places, Carmel-by-the-sea, California. We had spent time here before and fell in love with this small beach town and were excited to be back.
Unfortunately, there were parts of this trip where we were fighting. And I guess it makes sense that two people being with each other 24/7 would eventually get on each other’s nerves. But this time it was different. In the middle of a really stupid argument, my husband said he wanted a divorce.
I couldn’t believe that our fighting had escalated to the point where divorce was even on the table. I asked him if he really meant it. Still angry he shouted yes; he wanted a divorce. I was devastated. He said we should make plans for me to get up to the airport in San Jose, and he would continue on the trip alone.
I had booked reservations to our next few destinations already and I began to cancel them on my phone. When my husband saw what I was doing, he lost his shit. He was actually mad at me for cancelling our upcoming plans! I calmly told him that we are currently making plans to drive up to the airport and drop me off there…from my point of view, this trip was over, at least for me, and he could figure out his own accommodations.
It was at that point, things calmed down and he said he didn’t really mean what he had said and he wanted to continue the trip together. But the truth is, I was upset because this wasn’t the first time a minor disagreement had blown up into a massive argument, where in the end he would say things like this. I was over it. I was sick of being screamed at and threatened. And I had spent so much of my time planning out and prepping for this trip, I was mad that he just wanted to bring me to the airport, so he could go do everything I had planned out for us alone.
After talking things through, we decided to continue our trip together. But we were both mentally and emotionally drained from all the drama. And we both still had some frustrations about the situation.
The next morning, we were walking to our car, and a man approached us in the parking lot. My husband and I started making small talk with him. We asked him if he was local to the area and he said no, he just looked around and said, no, he was just passing through. He started talking about how important it is to have gratitude in life, even when things are going bad.
Then looked at us and told us how God didn’t want us to divorce. We hadn’t even mentioned that we were married, but he could have seen our rings. He went on to say that couples give up too easily these days. He said that there is something special and important about us being together as a couple and that we should always work through our problems. We were both speechless and had no idea what to say. We wrapped up the conversation with him, keeping things light. I felt emotional, though, and I know he sensed it. He kept eye contact with me and paused at the end, nodded, and went on his way.
When he was gone, my husband and I turned and stared at each other. We literally didn’t know what to say. I wondered if this man could have overheard our fight, but I don’t think it is possible. But even if he had, how often do complete strangers interject themselves into issues between a married couple? Not many.
But what this mystery man did was disrupt our pattern of being grumpy after a big fight and helped us see things from a place of gratitude and rationality. His message about divorce felt like we were meant to receive it – which is so weird, I know. Who randomly says the things he said to us? But talking with him helped us see all that was going right between us than what was going wrong.
Sometimes we hear what we need to hear from the most unlikely places. Some people just feel drawn to others to tell them what they need to hear. All we have to do is be willing to listen and understand that we are part of something bigger than ourselves.
