When you feel unloved or lonely, your first reaction might be to seek that love from other people. You might look for a new love interest or try to rekindle the love you once shared with your current partner. This applies also to other relationships, including friendships, business connections, and work partnerships. But instead of love, you might be seeking more appreciation, caring, respect, or value.
It may be hard to believe at first glance, but if any of your relationships seem to be lacking in love, respect, or anything else, it’s a sign that you have actually disconnected from the flow of your own inner love. The truth is you cannot receive from others what is not already within you. When you feel unloved or unappreciated, you can only attract people who make you feel unloved and unappreciated. The perception that you are lacking love actually pushes love further away from you.
On the other hand, when you allow your own self-love and appreciation to flow freely, your energy changes so that you can’t help but attract people who want to love and appreciate you. This can include new relationships coming into your life, but you will also notice that even the behavior and attitudes of people you have known for years will begin changing for the better. They will seem kinder, more patient, and more interested in connecting with you in meaningful ways. When you fill yourself up with love, it draws out the love from within them.
Filling yourself up with love is a simple matter of treating yourself the way you wish other people would treat you. Consider the ways you would like to be treated by a love interest or business partner, or anyone else. How would they speak to you? What would they do for you? How would they look at you? Begin doing these very same things for yourself. Speak kindly to yourself. Spend quality time with yourself. Treat yourself to small gifts or dinner at your favorite restaurant.
Most importantly, practice feeling loved as much as you can. Think about how it feels to be loved, that warm, secure, happy feeling that fills you up inside. This feeling of love does not need to be tied to any one person, and you can deliberately generate it anytime you wish. Do this a few times each day, especially when you first wake up, and right before you go to sleep.
Say to yourself over and over, “I am loved, I am valued, I am appreciated.” Stay focused on these thoughts until you do begin to feel that inner love flowing. Over time, all feelings of lack, emptiness, and loneliness should start to fade. And the longer you practice with this exercise, the feelings of love will only continue to get stronger over time.
Most surprising of all, you should notice that the people in your life begin to respond to the different energy you are holding within. They might spontaneously start being kinder to you, or actively seeking to spend more time with you, simply because you are no longer demanding it from them but rather drawing it forth according to your own inner state of love.
