You were created to do great things. Sometimes, it may be obvious what that is; other times, not so much. Often, it is through the ups and downs in our lives that we discover what our purpose is, or what our strengths and weaknesses are. And we can use that as a launching pad.
Greatness happens not by getting to our destination, but by our trials and tribulations along our journey. We become great because we struggled and overcame our challenges. It is our growth that we have along the way, that only blossoms from our setbacks and obstacles.
Sometimes along the way, you will encounter people who aren’t happy about your growth and achievements. It reminds them of their lack of growth or willingness to go out there and live their dreams. And it can be incredibly painful when the people who feel this way about you, are the ones closest to you.
While your first thought might be to question your growth and the dreams you have, know that whatever they are feeling about what you are doing is completely on them. And it is really about how they feel about themselves than anything you are doing. Getting out of your comfort zone is scary. And people tend to shy away from it. And when they see someone else out there growing and doing the things, they wish they could (and they can) do, they want to hold you back because it makes them feel more comfortable because then they won’t feel alone in their stagnation. They may resort to putting you down and criticizing your efforts in an attempt to derail your progress.
Case in point: When I changed my diet to become healthier, I was super motivated and excited to start the process. Someone very close to me, decided that I shouldn’t “deprive myself” of candy around Easter time, so they sent me this massive basket filled with candy. True story. And it went right into the trash because I was off sugar. I was actually pretty pissed. Not because I felt tempted, because I didn’t at all. I was upset because this is a person who I had hoped with support me through the process and not feel so threatened that they had to try to sabotage me.
But here’s the thing to remember – you don’t have to shrink yourself to fit into places you’ve outgrown, just to make someone else feel comfortable. That isn’t your job. Your job is to evolve into the best version of yourself and do what you have been called to do. And the right people around you, will support your growth and be excited for you. So appreciate them for being the sweet souls that they are and be compassionate to those close to you who are struggling with your growth.
What exactly does that mean?
Know your audience. While you shouldn’t need to lessen yourself or downplay your accomplishments or achievements, know that not everyone is going to have the same drive and determination that you have. And that is completely okay. While you may want your friends and family who feel threatened by your growth to be happy for you, understand that what you seek may not materialize. Meet them where they are and remind yourself that the lack of excitement or validation from them doesn’t diminish your growth and accomplishments. Make sure you balance things by spending time with people who support your growth and cheer you on, too.
