The scars you wear are evidence of how hard you have fought to save yourself. Be proud of all that you have overcome. In an earlier post, I talk about how trauma creates changes that you don’t choose and that healing is about creating change that you do choose. Many times, the wars that we have had to fight where not ones of our choosing – especially when we were younger. We had to level up and confront the war, even when we weren’t ready or didn’t know how to respond. We did the best we could under the circumstances. And we survived.
Japanese culture has an interesting way of looking at things that have been through battle. In Japan, when an object is broken, say a bowl, it is repaired with a lacquer that is mixed with precious metals, like platinum, gold or silver. They call this the art of kintsugi. The breakage and repair are something that is highlighted and shown as the history of the object, rather than something they try to hide or disguise. And many times, these objects are passed down through generation after generation. They don’t believe that the object loses its value because it has been broken. It is regarded as more distinctive and valuable because of what it has been through.
Sometimes we sell ourselves short or think that we are less than because of our experiences. But we are not what happened to us or our decisions. They are things happened to us or are things we did. They are not who we are.
Be proud of the wars you have fought. Remember that you either walk inside your story and own it or you stand outside of your story and hustle for your own worthiness. And you never know how many will hear your story and it become someone else’s survival manual.
