Healthy people don’t go around tearing others down to make themselves feel better. Dimming someone else’s light doesn’t make our light shine brighter. Most of us feel bad when we realize that we did something or said something that made someone else feel bad or insecure. It’s often unintentional on our part. But perhaps we need to start being more intentional with how we connect to others.
But in our modern era, those we care about most often don’t feel like we understand or support them. Truly seeing someone and showing them that they are heard and supported is a gift we are all starving for. It is rare that we 100% show up for someone in a way that leaves them feeling like they are the only thing that matters in that moment. We are bombarded by constant interruptions and thoughts of what we need to get done, and that inevitably shows when we interact with them. If this sounds inaccurate, next time you go out to eat, observe how many people are on their phones while dining with others.
The next time you go out with your significant other, friend or family member, I dare you to put away your phone. Be 100% present with them. Make eye contact, really listen to what they have to say rather than thinking about how you will respond. Fully understand them, validate their experience. Let them know that you support them and that you have their back. Showing up in this way for others, and having them show up this way for you, too, can make all the difference in your relationships.
