We often take how others treat us to heart and believe that how treat us is a statement about our value or worth. But most of the time, how people treat us has nothing to do with us, and everything to do with how they feel about themselves.
Other people’s negativity can only affect us if we are on the same frequency. How we deal with crappy treatment, hurtful comments or overall negativity is 100% on us. We can determine how we respond. And when you internalize that we are truly responsible for our own thoughts and feelings, it is easier to take a step back and not take things personally.
When people cope by projecting, what they are doing is protecting their ego and sense of self-worth by attributing traits, feelings or actions that they don’t like about themselves onto someone else. For example, if a spouse is cheating on their partner, they may accuse their partner of being unfaithful, when there is no evidence of it.
People who project onto others often have this anxiety inside them because they are uncomfortable with the feelings they have towards themselves. By projecting onto others, they release some of the anxiety related to it, without actually addressing the real issue – which is how they are feeling about themselves. It is an ineffective coping mechanism. Think of it as a pipe under immense pressure and each time the person projects, some of the pressure is released by the valve. The problem is, because the real issue is never being addressed, the pressure builds right back up.
Obviously, this behavior is not okay. But when you see it for what it is, you aren’t as easily offended or hurt. You can take a step back and respond to the person in a way that makes you feel proud of yourself. You can be the light and vibrate higher.
